An Alternative Leadership Mindset: Problem Solving Isn’t Always Your Problem
During a recent conversation about coaching and leadership mindsets, I shared with a friend a deceptively simple yet deeply impactful principle of effective leadership; "You are not the fixer." When we share this mindset in our Harborbridge leadership programs, it consistently resonates with participants. There's a collective sigh or even a groan, a nod, and often someone says how much that hits home. It strikes a chord because, deep down, we understand a fundamental truth: despite our best intentions, it's neither possible nor is it our role to solve every problem for everyone. Leaders naturally feel a strong urge to provide solutions, yet embracing this mindset liberates both themselves and their teams, fostering a space for growth and autonomy.
The Power of Stepping Back
Learning to resist the urge to step in and fix can transform both team and individual growth. It shifts the dynamic from dependence to one of empowerment, allowing team members to build confidence in their abilities and judgments.
This mindset also fosters a culture of innovation. Empowered to solve problems without their leader intervening, team members are encouraged to experiment, take risks, and innovate, secure in the knowledge that their leadership supports and trusts them.
The Real Work for Leaders
It’s one thing to understand this mindset, the real challenge is in its implementation. Turning this principle into practice requires significant self-management. Leaders must resist the urge to solve every problem and intervene when a team member is struggling. Of course, there are exceptions, especially in high stakes situations when stepping in becomes necessary . However, consistently rescuing team members at the first sign of struggle teaches an adverse lesson. Doing this not only robs individuals of valuable learning opportunities but may also signal a lack of confidence in their abilities, among other unintended messages.
Consider the parallel in parenting. My 6-year old is currently learning to read, and when he stumbles on a new word, I have to resist the impulse to say it for him. Instead, I encourage him to sound it out, despite his frustrations and my desperate desire to get through another dull story about a cat sitting on a mat. I sense his discomfort and I acknowledge that I have to sit in my own discomfort, resisting the compulsion to “fix” it for him. Because I know that not only will he not learn, he’ll get the message that he can’t do it: dual pitfalls of dependency and self-doubt.
Just as in leadership when a team member is facing a problem, resisting the impulse to fix is not about detachment or passivity but rather is an active decision to empower them to find their own solutions, promoting resilience and autonomy.
It's Not Easy, But It's Worth It
Adopting this mindset that “you are not the fixer” is not always easy, but it’s worth it. It challenges us to accept discomfort with the goal of genuinely empowering those we lead. Leaders are often chosen for their problem-solving skills, yet, true leadership extends beyond fixing problems to allowing others to find their own solutions.
This week, I encourage you to be mindful when you feel compelled to “fix.” Remember this mindset, take a step back and sit in discomfort. Watch as empowerment, innovation, and perhaps something even more profound begin to unfold.